The Liebster Award

Could I be any more chuffed? I only went and got bloody nominated for a Liebster Award! Ok I'm not even gunna pretend I know what it is but sod it, it's an award and I got a mention! By the lovely Amy at Kitty and Pip I'm kidding - obviously I checked out what this is all about ! (And then I copy and pasted the description Amy [thanks bro] "The Liebster Award is a chain of awards passed on by bloggers, in an effort to recognise their wonderful work. “Liebster” in German means sweetest, kindest, nicest, valued and pleasant."

So, the rules of the Liebster Award 2016:
1 – Acknowledge the blog who nominated you and display the award
2 – Answer the eleven questions the blogger gives you
3 – Give eleven random facts about yourself
4 – Nominate eleven blogs that you think are deserving of this award
5 – Let the bloggers know you have nominated them
6 – Give them eleven questions to answer

My Qs from kittyandpip


1. What is your favourite book? I love The Time Traveler's Wife.
2. What is the biggest lesson parenthood has taught you? I've learnt to be resilient and that I most certainly don't come first! And that shit doesn't smell that bad, vomit is ok and getting pissed on (on a daily basis) is bearable.
3. When you were a kid, what did you want to be when you grew up? Hands down I was convinced I was going to be a singer. Or some sort or celebrity. Oops - I'm just a normal person. 😂 Fml.
4. Do you have a party trick? Tell us what it is. I really don't. Aside from getting in a horrific state after very few drinks I just don't. And if I do, I certainly can't remember 😂🙊
5. Where would be your ideal dream holiday? Thailand. We slummed it for a honeymoon trip for 3 weeks and stayed in some questionable places - I remember being hungover over a 'hole toilet' on a moving train... It was awkward but still a great experience. Then having to wash my deposit down some other 'hole toilet' with a bucket of water.. 😳 as much as it doesn't sound like it, we did take part in other activities not just going to the toilet haha!
6. Is there anything you said you’d never do as a parent but now you do? Go to sleep early. 9pm is a late night for me!
7. What one thing would you like to go back and tell your teenage self? Don't worry about your imperfections, make fun of them and people will laugh with you not at you. (Hopefully they were never actually laughing at me anyway)
8. What is your biggest fear? Losing the love of my life. I'm so lucky to have married my best friend.
9. What do you love about blogging/vlogging the most?It's so supportive - have come across some amazing people and great ideas. I love reading people's story. Also that it's so easy to talk to people as they tend to keep up with your blog and always have a conversation starter.
10. Describe you perfect date night? Pyjamas, Chinese (food not necessarily race) a bottle of red and my cat cuddled with us. And definitely no sex! Just a nice massage and a long ass sleep.
11. What moment made you think ‘oh my gosh! I am an adult now!’ When my vag spit out a child.

Now for 11 random facts about me...

1 I used to be a man - I'm joking. Sometimes I wish I could be one though because it's so easy.. Beer, butts, boobs and ball-twiddling. And b-jobs... Life is sweet for men!

2 I love the smell of soil and no idea why! It's just like such a fresh smell!

3 All of my family live abroad ! So thankful for joes fam!

4 LOVE all things 'Lush' and the Body Shop is growing on me - face masks in particular!

5 suffered a lot with miscarriages in the past which makes me so tolerant of the shit bits of motherhood

6 my fav drink is ... That's pretty hard but I love watermelon smoothies (only ever had them in Thailand) strawb daiquiris and piña coladas ahhhh so many !

7 I'd never been on a rollercoaster until I was like 19!

8 I used to date Ben Affleck (ok that was a lie too- I wish) *i have a celeb crush on Ben Affleck*

9 I can probably recite the entire finding Nemo film

10 as above for 'grease'

11 I've worn my hair in a mum bun for approximately 345 out of the last 365 days!

Now this next bit I was not looking forward to .. Picking 11 bloggers who I love. I mean I am delighted to share and give them a mention but picking only 11 is tough so so many people make me laugh cry and live a bit of their life with them each day! But here are my 11 definite reads;

1 Life As A Single Mum  - adore reading her posts and the power of a woman is made clear in charlottes story!

2 Dad's Diary - Fml mate you crack me up on a daily basis please follow this rad dad!

3 Sprogs Blog - I love following Emily's insta as well as keeping up to date with her posts!

4 Teabee Blog - I do not have time for make up testing and beauty worrying .. So I read tanias reviews and buy what she recommends ! She saves me time and helps me look glam!! Love this girls blog seriously check it out !!

5 This Is A Mum's World  a new blogger and I absolutely adore her posts - from bags to circuits and pelvic floors she really has the perfect balance of being herself and 'mum'

6 Random Thoughts of a Twenty Something Blog - to say I love her page is an understatement. I love having a browse at Carla's blog because she's so inspiring. She discusses real issues of mental health and combines it with the fun quirkiness of her personality too with stories of holidays and hair. Go give her a quick view!

7 Marianne Smiles the oh-so-touching story of the birth of Oliver I could relate to 100000% I felt that same with Amelie and I've felt so on par with this girl ever since reading her story.

8 This Little Mom makes me giggle so much from her 30 second showers to packing for holiday!! She does 'serious' too though and her post on sharing her baby I related to so much .. Because I've been told the same and was like stfu!

9 Life W/ Littles  her two year old rules the roost and her blog makes me excited [weary] for mine to turn 2, too! can relate because for her pregnancy 'shit' did not end at labour and I equally battled so much post pregnancy and post labour physical crap!

10  Mommy in Leggings our babies are around the same age so I love reading her blog! It's got handy tips like how to fix a hole in your leggings, removing water stains from wood alongside trips to the zoo! She's so glam and inspiring too - baby weight lost in 5 months !! Check out her post!

11 Rachel Swirl  hands down enjoy every read!

So here are 11 questions for you:

1 name a favourite (could be anything)

2 the most fun you've ever had was..? (Nothing rude please 😂)

3 what inspired you to start blogging?

4 What is the blog post you're most proud of?

5 favourite time of year?

6 coffee or tea?

7 What is the most bizarre experience you've had?

8 If you could have a super power which would you choose?

9 Any recommendations for rainy day activities? (I'm wheats stuck for these)

10 what would you tell your teenage self if you could?

11 something that makes you happy?

Thanks for reading and I hope you take part because this has taken me a little while to do and I'd love to see your replies!!

😁

Magic Santa Letter

I know what you're thinking, it's September - why is she already talking thinking about Christmas. Firstly, it's expensive. So what's wrong with a little forward planning? But more importantly, it's my little ones first ever Christmas, so 'excited' doesn't quite come close to how we are all feeling. What better way to mark this special occasion than buying her a personalised letter from the man himself?! Santa Claus.

After the shit storm that has been 'new mummyhood' the last thing on my mind has been a scrapbook. I mean I always have it in mind, but actually creating one is not yet on my radar. I'm barely managing to tidy up at the end of the day! However, I've been keeping bits and bobs for her, in a 'special' box [its just an empty gift box, hehe). So, obviously I thought a letter from Santa would be a great addition.

I came across the 'Magic Santa Letter' range and instantly fell in love. With the high quality paper, careful attention to detail and exceptionally affordable prices I knew I had to have one. Lucky for us, they provide a 'Baby's First Christmas' option which was perfect for us. The paper is beautiful with Christmas themed patterns and it really does have a 'magical' look to it! You have the option to choose their 'scroll effect' paper. But even the less expensive option is beautiful and so reasonable at £3.99. That price includes free delivery, a free 'good child' certificate, and has its very own envelope (addressed to your child) also. There is the option to pick a letter that is slightly more expensive (probably suitable for older children) and comes in at £7.99 but in addition to free postage and the 'good child' certificate, it includes scroll effect paper, magical reindeer food, and a 'Santa stop here' door hanger as well!

I know it's early, but I couldn't be more excited to place an order on launch day! The website was exceptionally user friendly and gave a great description of what was included in each pack. There is the option of partial or full personalisation so you can create the exact product you would like. It's perfect for first time parents like us, but also a lovely idea for grandparents, aunts, uncles and the like to treat the youngsters in their families to a little extra magical feel this Christmas.

I was lucky enough to team up with 'Magic Santa Letter' and can offer anyone reading this 30% off any option using my code. VR30OFF

I can't do the maths for every option because I am not a great fan of maths, but have worked out that choosing the least expensive option (suitable for all ages) is £2.82 !

You can check out the website and order yours here

Thanks for reading xx

I've discovered the fear of letting go

The day has come. The day that I would have leapt for joy about when I was in the initial shit storm that was new motherhood. Nursery. I'm not getting ahead of myself and saying Amelie had gone to nursery, but we started the visits. I remember one very sleepless night (in the first few weeks of being home) googling how early certain nurseries accepted babies and seriously considering dropping Amelie to one a few mornings per week just to catch some z's. Needless to say, that improved and my need for nursery help soon faded. This time six months on, our main focus with nursery is Amelie's development - mainly her social skills. I take her to baby groups but I'm always there with her as support, and we're hoping (this is 'we the parents' I'm not being lame and using 'we' to pretend it's Amelie and my decision) she will develop a sense of independence. Said sense of independence comes in around £50-£70 per day depending on our choice, but at the moment it's looking as though we are sending her to a local private school nearer the top of that price range... Cue pasta and jacket potatoes for dinner for the foreseeable future! My aim is not to review our first visited place, rather to tell you my personal feelings around nursery in general -  so for that reason I won't name the place we initially visited - but let me tell you... I couldn't help clinging on to my baby girl tighter than she was to me!

So our visit went a little something like this: we parked up, all smiles; we walked in to a colourful and lovely environment - still smiling. Then we began our tour. The staff seemed lovely, all the right procedures were spoken about as you'd expect! But the spaces I kept looking at - I just couldn't imagine leaving my baby girl at. Nothing was particularly wrong with any if it, I just watched the children there and couldn't help imagining that Amelie would be the same. One little girl crawling around her cot in the room that was supposedly a quiet space for nap time despite a member of staff loudly speaking on the phone and several staff coming in and out and letting the door slam. I know it's probably all great for 'character building' but my little sensitive munchkin sleeps and I tiptoe around the house. Or I sleep with her!

"So if you let us know her sleep schedule and eating routine we will match it"

I was distracted by the lady showing me around. It's brilliant that they ensure continuity to her schedule but schedule and routine? We went with the flow most days. If we went swimming (mainly because she was being a whingy pain) she would sleep after obviously. Sometimes she is a delight and isn't whingy so we don't swim and she sleeps earlier. She eats when she's hungry, or (again) when she's grizzly. I've skilfully observed some of my mummy friends distracting baby grunts with food and I think it's great! So I've done the same. [Shoutout to Charlotte and Lauren, you guys have been heroes on this!] So what kind of parent would I be if I just told this member of staff that she's more of a 'flow rider' of a baby. As in easy-going, not a middle aged black rapper! We have a bedtime routine but that's mainly for my sanity so I know when I can count on definite 'chill' time, and I doubt that will come in handy at nursery - although if night nurseries existed, I'm not sure I'd mind so much if Amelie was crawling around her cot in the middle of the night while I was snoring away in our king size at home. As long as she was happy!

I'm digressing. On we went with our tour and I spotted a very unhappy baby clinging to a member of staff. She was in the 1-2 group so I felt sorry for the woman holding her because I already struggle with my one who weighs less-than-the-average-6-month-old. But within minutes we were done inside and we had a look at the outdoor area. Again, pretty impressive and some sand and water for kids to play with. Seemed good enough. We went back in and the crying baby was now laying on the floor pretty much licking it and no staff really cared. Leaving a baby to 'cry it out' is not for me at all and is something I feel really strongly about, telling anyone that looks after Amelie that I don't agree with it and giving strict instructions for that not to happen. The rooms for older children made me feel more at ease and the kids looked much happier. There was a clear love of children and passion for the job all around, I just felt that the really little ones being left weren't entirely sure why they were there and just pulled on my heart strings.

I clung on harder to my little monkey and decided that she can work on her social skills a little later in her little life because for now, all she needs is her Daddy and me. Her baby groups and friends on play dates can help with social skills until I feel ready to let her go.

This whole experience got me thinking about attachment and how my personal adult feelings could possibly be a hinderance to my daughter. I'm still reluctant to let her go into her own room despite knowing she'll most probably be absolutely fine. I know she'd soon get used to nursery even if she did cry for the first few weeks, and deep down I know it would aid her development. I don't want to bang on about losing babies, but this is a real issue and very painful hurt that doesn't leave you just because you've managed to have a baby. A little part of me is too scared of ever trying for a baby again in case it doesn't ever happen... And in that case, every moment with Amelie could be my last 'baby moment' because one day, she'll no longer need me every second of the day. I moan about it (pretty often to be fair) that I don't get a second to myself, but there's a little part of that, that is pretty warming inside. This precious little being looks to you for every need. I don't want my fears and worries (and obviously over attachment) to impact her, but it's hard. I wasn't lying when I said all areas of parenthood are insanely testing not only both physically and mentally - but on all levels possible.

Ah, all that from a nursery visit! God help me when it's school, and I no longer have the choice! Haha.

We love food

So we began our weaning adventure a week early at 16 weeks! This part of parenting I absolutely LOVE! What's better than cooking up an array of varying colours and flavours and watching a little face explore new flavours! (Avacado was my favourite so far) As I understand it, it's not recommended to start until 6 months but 17 weeks is an absolute minimum. Well my kid was (as usual) exploding into about 8 nappies per day so I did what I saw fit! I myself eat a couple of bananas when I have a dodgy tummy so I began with a tiny amount of banana mixed with her milk! A few teaspoons to start with only but it cleared it up for her. You're supposed to give the same fruit or veg for a couple of days to observe for reactions so I stuck to banana for pretty much all week! I saw somewhere that you should give vegetable as a first food for 2 weeks and this was my plan... After the banana helped soothe Amelie's butt explosions! (Which it did soon enough) 

I did some research and found that a lady called Annabel Karmel is like the Michelin star chef of the baby weaning world. Even though the recipes did in fairness tingle my own taste buds, I felt that it was just a recipe book and I had no idea which foods were ideal for when (and why) so I opted for the informative Ella's Kitchen first foods book. It makes for easy reading but covers all key aspects relating to babies' development as well! For instance, I never knew that babies' iron levels plummet at around 6 months and iron rich foods are vital! So I had stuck rigidly to the 2 week day-by-day guide to weaning! - we just cut out the broccoli and cauliflower because Amelie is a gassy baby (joy for me) and I wanted to avoid these vegetables as I had already started the process of weaning so early. This book is seriously like a bible for the anxious parent, ie: me!

It's needless to say, I LOVE this 'phase'; watching the chick's squirming face as she discovers flavours she's not sure of and smiling face as she is [demanding me to keep] shovelling in heaped spoonfuls of spinach into her grin-blushed face! We have persisted with some 'unsure of' flavours to encourage a wide ranging taste bud, but I'm not gunna torture my kid and subject her to brussels sprouts too persistently - that and it makes our house smell like a burst sewage pipe. We don't need that kind of negativity at 11am. 

So I've said I have been enjoying this bit. But obviously not every bit of it! The cleaning is unreal! Our chosen meal always ends in food chaos leading to a full blown wash. I started co-showering because my back just couldn't take anymore bending over the bath. Once a day is plenty! Plus it's so convenient and quick! Having to cook food fresh is also quite tiresome, and making sure it's a well balanced 'meal' takes its toll. Have I given enough vitamins? Any carbohydrates? Have I fed her too much? Perhaps too little? We are a good couple of months in with solids and I'm now having to think about healthy and nutritionally balanced meals. Amelie will sometimes have a meal twice a day, but it's not quite regular yet, I kind of just go with it! Honestly, that's the best advice I could've given myself: just go with it. She will eat what she wants and how frequently she wants it. She knows best. I mean, within reason. Since discovering cheese triangles, I'm fairly certain that she would eat 3 if she could! But we will stick to a half of one and on a good day, a whole cheese triangle as the salt content is a little higher than I'd like and I've recently (from Ella's book also, I should be an Ella's rep!) learnt that baby's kidneys struggle to process salt at this age still so it's best to avoid!

Below are some funny, and mildly annoying things I've discovered recently:

1. No matter what is on the spoon, it will end up all over a baby's face and hands! Cue the eye rubbing by baby and a frantic search for wet wipes by me!

2. What started out as 'oh she's so cute reaching for the spoon and trying to feed herself' has now turned to 'oh god you've shoved the spoon too far and now you're gagging up the entire mouthful' or 'ffs you have just grabbed the spoon and shovelled the spoonful all over your face because you missed your entire mouth'. So now we just hold hands and shout 'yaaaay' as animated as possible to distracted from said spoon!

3. Babbling is so lovely. Not when each one starts as soon as you put a spoon of yoghurt to your baby's mouth.

4. As above but sub babbling for blowing raspberries.

5. When you've slaved away at a baby recipe and your kid takes one taste and gives you a face like 'what on gods earth is this rubbish, take it away.' That's a real face.

6. Smell - some veg really stinks. So broccoli, sprouts, peas kale. Basically I'm sure anything green.

7. Appearance - whilst berries and colourful veg is exciting and looks the-bomb-.com, when you start blending actual meals lots of it looks the same going in as it will coming out. Best example: lasagne! And maybe porridge. 

8. The nappies. Goodbye yellow with white speckles... Brace yourself for adult like (in every imaginable way) poo. And I'm being 100% serious when I say EVERY time we get in the car, I have a poo to deal with. It's not even exaggeration. (so I'd be grateful if anyone could confirm this is normal or had any advice on this issue!)

That's all I could think of for now. I've lost track of how many bibs I have cleaned, and replaced! I used to just chuck them in the washing machine and wash in a couple of days, but then when it came out mouldy (after being washed) I realised bibs needed instant cleaning and only then could be placed in the washing machine. Oops! The chair in which Amelie eats gets washed more times than my hair in a week, and as for the pots, pans and liquidiser... They're the story of my life, daily basis.

But when you see how much they grow and how they develop from liquid to semi liquid then start taking in chunks and texture, you can't help but feel proud and see how it was all totally worth it! 

Having said that, I can't wait until I can just give her a bog standard sandwich for lunch, and McDonald's for dinner. (I'm kidding about the dinner, it'll be KFC) 

ps follow my Twitter and insta if you like?

@mummingmadness

In love with 'Sudocrem Care and Protect' ointment

Im a mum on the go. I couldn't think of anything worse than being stuck indoors all week with my dribbling mini me (or mini 'her dad' to be honest) and just watch tv or swivel the same rattle at a desperate attempt to converse with my 5 month old! Don't get me wrong, I love that part of being a parent, but it's hardly fulfilling to either of us! We like mini experiences!

So...We took a road trip! I woke up super early (to be fair I wake up no later than 6am every morning thanks to my babbling, snooze-free [mini] human alarm clock! We were headed for a picnic at the park with Amelie's grandparents!

I was ready for a fun filled day; she woke up grumpy. This was a combination of a horrendous nights's sleep and teething! The joys of parenthood meant I'd drawn the inevitable short straw and was about to endure a fairly long car journey with a monster. She fell asleep to be fair and the drive was smooth sailing! Until about half way, when she pooed herself awake! I've lost track of the amount of times I'd spent my driving times bargaining with my 5 month old about which bit of road (usually an A-Road) is safe to pull over at. If she's not in the mood to wait (she never is) I have to pull over on some obscure looking supposed parking bay. So on this particular day, I did just that. Found a safe place and plonked my pooey baby in the boot! I was met with not only the usual, but nappy rash too. Great. I have a couple of go-to creams - one which is so intense it irritates her skin after more than a couple of applications; the other  Sudocrem. I was excited to recently receive a tube of 'Sudocrem Care and Protect' and decided it would be the perfect opportunity to test it out.

Sudocrem Care and Protect is a triple care ointment which can be used at every nappy change - something which is unique to me as I have not yet discovered an ointment that is suitable for frequent use. I'm not saying the rash disappeared after one single use, but it had begun to look less angry and my little one's mood improved not long after applying the ointment no doubt. This was a huge relief as it meant she could enjoy her time with her grandparents who had travelled some distance and don't get a chance to see her often. I felt relieved that I could apply as frequently as I wanted and continued to use it throughout the day. I had no reason to worry about rubbing or chaffing, as the cream itself acts as a barrier not only protecting the rashy area, but locking out the bacteria found in baby's waste. It also ensures that the good stuff like Vitamin E and Pro Vitamin B5 (which help skin stay soft, healthy and moisturized) stays sealed in.

We got home after a great day at the park with the in-laws and I was ready to tackle the bedtime routine. Much to my surprise, there was not the usual thick 'paste-like' residue as one might expect with the original 'pot' of Sudocrem. One of my favourite things about this cream in particular is that it's so light in texture and leaves no trace of anything behind, only a genuinely soft feel to your baby's skin. I even used it to try and soothe minor sunburn and was shocked at the amazing result!

It's no wonder that Sudocrem Care and Protect has won Product of the Year 2015 in the category of 'Best Nappy Cream' and with a very reasonable price of around £3 (having looked across a range of pharmacies and supermarkets) it's a no brainer!

Every mum most certainly needs one of these as part of their baby care essentials, I certainly won't be going without mine for a while.

I've looked across a vast range of shops and currently the best offer stands at Superdrug. You can pick up a tube here

My Cost-Conscious Week: Fun for a Fiver

So I've said before that I will share my motherhood discoveries as I discover them myself. Recently on the life-vine: money. With it being summer and wedding season we are definitely feeling the sting, so I've been scratching my head a little over how best to ensure a wholesome experience for Amelie [albeit she is only 5 months] and myself throughout the week. Then I realised that actually, there are a large number of ways to enjoy the weekdays that don't cost much at all. (Obviously excluding petrol because to me, that's already calculated into the essential monthly budget) 

So I set myself a challenge of entertaining ourselves for the week, for £5.

Day 1 - Soft Play

We have recently discovered soft play. So let me just declare my love for these places. Anywhere between 50p-£1.25 is standard adult entry, and totally free for under 1s! The price is great, but the best part? It's a sensory heaven for babies. They are constantly taking in their surroundings and absorbing new sights, sounds, textures and the like, so it acts as an intense learning platform for them. What appeared to be a large foam Lego piece to me, provided over an hour of entertainment for Amelie and me. Of course we weren't just holding onto a block for an hour, there were colours to look at, other children to socialise with and a great deal of varying sounds to take in. I don't crash and bang around at home, I don't run around and I certainly don't screech. These things are all new for Amelie and are (often scary) but part of her learning, and will do wonders for her social skills! So for 65p it's great! Usually I would get a cup of tea and a cake, but for this week I wanted to actually stick to the £5 rule so opted to take a drink with me and had lunch at home!

Day 2- Picnic in the Park

What better than to ensure mumma and baby both gain something from the venture. I met up with my friend who also happens to have a baby to have a picnic in the sunshine - and shade for Amelie -and we had a great time. I picked up some Sainsburys Basics strawberries (which looked nicer than the slightly more upmarket ones to be fair) and a lovely Apple and Pear juice, and grabbed some crisps from home! £1.80 was the total cost here, and I become aware I had spent nearly half of my weekly budget on the second day but I was determined to achieve my goal! 

Day 3 - Garden Centre

My little cherub absolutely adores fish! I'm sure it's the lights and sounds as well as the colourful nature of fish that she enjoys really, but nevertheless it's always a great success for us. This month we do not have £17.50 for the sea life centre (yes it is that expensive) so I researched garden centres in the local area to see which ones had an aquatic section, so we could have our fishy fun for absolutely free. We saw puffer fish, pond fish and pretty much the entire cast of finding nemo (or Dory, whichever one is most currently 'lost') without spending a penny. I felt a little apprehensive with zero intention of buying fish so I actually asked one of the salesman if it was ok to have a quick look at the fish. He ended up coming around with us for a short while to talk us through some fish! So an all round great experience.

Day 4 - Beach Walk and the Chippy

What's better than the sea front? Amelie and I had a lazy morning with a nice lay in and some garden time, but we both prefer to get out every day, so we waited for Joe to finish work before our day out. We went for a super long walk equipped with bottles, nappies and other baby essentials like a change of clothes in case of a poo explosion and a jumper and million blankets. Just a few of the bare necessities. So a large portion of chips is £1.50 and a jumbo battered sausage is £1.00. Joe and I shared a large chips so I could technically claim it cost me personally 75p, but I won't! The point is, 4 days in and I'm £4.95 down. Not bad at all.

Day 5 - Windmill Walk

I am always fascinated by the windmill I drive past nearly daily. So despite the unappealing distance by foot, I packed a small load of baby bits and set off on what turned out to be just a little longer than a 2 hour walk. It sounds a lot, but in the 'walking-with-a-buggy-mum' world that's no distance at all! I'm seriously debating using Strava for these walks - now that I'm not likely to use it for runs or a bike ride anytime soon! So anyway, my point is, we discovered a beautiful windmill tucked away discreetly in a back road. And we loved it! A completely free day! It would seem silly not to research places like this locally. We are exceptionally fortunate to live in such a history-rich country, it'd be a shame not to take time out to appreciate it! 

My weekly total... £4.95! Mission accomplished. 

This is just a typical week for me, and by no means extensive! I do find it super easy to book into/onto things and before I know it were £50 down and that is hardly cost effective! We do not scrimp at the weekends either (but probably could) so these are just a few ideas to save a few pennies because who doesn't like saving 'some P' [I recently heard of this expression from my girl Tania - she keeps me up to date with the lingo] so below are a list of affordable or free activities I came up with!

• Play dates 
• Swimming - check your local swimming pool as often there are baby sessions. Our local area offer £2 for 2 adults and 2 children!
• Pet shop
• Local farms 
• Duck feeding 
• Long, adventurous walks
• Book shops - often offer free drawing stations for older children 
• Libraries - story times 

I'd love to hear any I might've missed! Hope this helps anyone at a loose end!

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Dads! I'm Learning to Empathise, not Critisize

Guess who I am? I've been to work all day, I've had endless meetings where I've spent a large chunk of it not really there. I mean, I am of course, physically there - but my mind wanders a lot lately. I have a brand new baby. I often wonder what she's up to, or whether she's mastered the particular skill she's been working on. My phone flashes. I'm excited at the thought of opening it up to find a picture of my little beauty queen. Instead it's my wife.

"Thanks for leaving the kitchen messy again ffs. I tidy all day and you mess it up every time you do anything. You literally have no respect for how hard it is to keep it clean. Thanks for appreciating my effort, I'm done cleaning up after you."

I want to explain myself and say that although I had promised to help with tidying up, it was half an hour before Amelie's bedtime, and I chose to play with her. Then I just somehow forgot. I have so much to keep in mind all day and for that I'm sorry but I also want to see my little girl. I know you tidy whilst looking after her all day, but that's just it. You see her ALL DAY, and I get half an hour or maybe an hour if she can manage staying awake. So I chose her.

Instead I just opt to say a simple 'sorry', because I really am. But I don't want to try and justify it because it's not really justifyable. My wife keeps a tidy house alongside the hard work of a baby, I should've done it later. That, and trying to make excuses would make it even worse. So I reply a simple reply and hope she's calmed down by the time I come home.

She hasn't. I'm met with an extremely stressed out woman who's indulged in one-too-many unsavoury nappies, so I'm immediately handed a child. If I'm lucky, there's not a poo explosion. Usually there is. She's even phoned me in the car on my way home before (on several occasions) to ask how long I'll be to see if a pooey nappy could somehow be 'saved' for me. Luckily, it never has. Yet.

She needs a break, I get that. But so do I. Both of us learnt quickly that it's not a competition; we are both tired. At the end of the day, she's exhausted and overwhelmed by baby related tasks, and I have an ever-exploding head full of business matters, baby bits and how I've been a shit let down, (according to the expression on her face) again. I haven't even had a second to catch up with my friends, so I spend an hour or so on my phone trying to catch up with the world, usually on the sofa after dinner. But this is a definite cause for bollocking. So I take it. Because she's stressed.

Guess what I am yet? A stressed out Dad, and person too.

                         *

 So my husband would never actually write a blog post and display it on social media; for starters, he doesn't say anything. but he doesn't have to. His expression says it all. It's no secret that a baby and relationship is extremely difficult to manage. Joe and I are no exception. But recently after a serious and very long chat, we both discovered that we are actually feeling EXACTLY the same - just he felt as though he didn't have as much right to say he's stressed out because I spend 90% of my time with Amelie. So this gave me a chance to (for the first time) EMPATHISE with him. Here he is, emotionally rock solid and always working to improve our situation in every way, yet all I could see were the surface behaviours which were not only annoying but completely frustrating me. Then I put myself in his shoes and kinda understood. I'm not sure how many dads feel like this, and I'm fairly certain they don't scower the Internet for mummy blogs.. The closest thing to 'mums' men look at would be on a TOTALLY different kind of website! But I just wanted to raise awareness of the other side of the coin as it were, because it was a real lightbulb moment for me!



I'm currently in the process of phasing out my blog posts from being linked to my personal Facebook account with a view for me to solely use my new Facebook page dedicated to this blog in a couple of months. If you would like to continue with me on my journey of motherhood, please head over to my page here and give it a like to continue receiving post updates.  Alternatively, you can search 'Mumming Madness'